Isn't It Ironic

Isn't It Ironic?

Irony: On September 11, 2011, I finished Harvest Moon Half Ironman Triathlon in Aurora, CO.  I am sure that I had a view of the University of Colorado Hospital from my hotel room and didn't even give it a second thought.  Fast forward; a little over 3 years later, I will be visiting that very same hospital this week to have my ASD and PFO repaired via a cardiac catheter procedure in which two patches will be placed over the holes.  I have been told this procedure will take anywhere from 4-6 hours.  I finished the Half Ironan in 5:36:05.  Irony.

Taking the irony one step further, I listened to the book, Unbroken, during my 6+ hour drive to the race as was recommended by a friend and neighbor.  What an inspirational story.  The movie came out last month.  Dean and I have been putting off seeing it in hopes of catching it while in Denver. This to be a "restful" outing on the day between my appointment and procedure. I don't even think I need to explain the irony in the title.

It amazes me how so many things in life end up coming full circle. Past experiences prepare you for future battles.

I admit it. I have been struggling to face the unknown.  However, this morning while sitting in Mass a sudden realization hit me. Going into this week, I have felt exactly how I feel one week before a big race.  Nervous; Excited; Scared; Unsettled; I think I have even noticed some adrenaline..... Sound familiar?  Then, a wise, little voice whispered,  "Use what you know.  You have faced so many physical challenges successfully.  You can do this, too. Be strong." SO TRUE!  I can do this. I will come out of this experience a stronger person.

In many ways, the challenge I am facing at 8 AM on Thursday morning is not much different than what I face at any start line in any race.  Most of life's challenges come down to what is between our ears; MENTAL.  Our bodies are capable of so much if we just let go and trust that they will carry us through.  When racing, I am putting trust in all the hard work and training that I have done in the months prior knowing my body is strong and can handle it. Although this is a different challenge, my body is still strong and can handle the task at hand.  In fact, it will very likely come out stronger in the end.  

Now, I know what I must do.  This week, I have to put trust in the training of my cardiologist.  This part is much harder for me, because I do not have control over this aspect.  Once I am put under anesthesia, most of the outcome is in the control of the doctor and his team.  I HATE NOT BEING IN CONTROL. Everyone who knows me knows this.  

Therefore, today, I am choosing to control the things I can and try to trust in the things I can't.  I will trust that I have chosen a fantastic doctor at a good hospital.  Someone (I wish I remember who) told me a few weeks ago, "Remember these doctors do these procedures like moms change diapers."  That has stuck with me and comforts me. So, I will make my lists. Grandma Brenda, will then know my girls schedule and important phone numbers, while she is here taking care of them.  I will leave good lesson plans for my substitute teacher, to ensure that my classroom runs smoothly in my absence.  I will pack my bags with all the items I will need this week.  

Tomorrow at 4:30 PM, I will give my girls the biggest hugs and kisses ever. I will bravely get in the car with Dean and leave everything here in good hands.  I can do this.  One step at a time. One foot in front of the other. I CAN DO THIS.